Posted to the Fail Fic post in July 2012. Highlights:

“You know,” Dobby said seductively, “Dobby’s penis has magical healing properties!”

“Oh Dobby, take me like it’s Pon Farr!” Spock rumbled.

—

On the bridge Captain Kirk was steering the ship and having alien sex with like six aliens because he was just that hot, while the others were doing less important things because they were not as awesome.

—

The emperor had yelled at him for the death star being blown up and shot magic missles at him even though he’d done his best, Luke didn’t want to be a sith with him and support his life choices which is a really hurtful thing to do, and how he’d never really found love (cuz Padme was a SKANKY HOE who didn’t love him at all!) and all the problems were swimming in his head and crawling in his skin, and also his orange wouldn’t peel!

–

And as it turned out, Darth Vader sucked a mean dick! Which was pretty damn impressive, thought Spock, considering he was still wearing the mask.

As of June 2013, also available in two parts (so far) on AO3:

A True Love Found

“An accident aboard the starship Enterprise sends Spock on a perilous journey…. TO LOVE!”

Spires of Weyr

“Spock and Dobby's blissful space honeymoon lead them to a new and exciting planet with new and exciting adventures. They also meet a new friend who desperately needs help.

… SEXY help!”