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goss

Goss

lady in tinfoil hat

“In short, spn_gossip's beef is that they are shitting their pants bugfuck and share more mass hallucinations than the tent with the brown acid at Woodstock.” — Oct. 27, 2014

“I'm pretty sure there are totalitarian regimes that invest less in propaganda than goss' version of the CW PR department.”— Jan. 31, 2015

“The salt and denial is its own little ocean. I feel like reasonable comments have to be rare seashells and seaglass, while the screaming frothing madness laps against the fertile sands of imagination.”— Sep. 27, 2015

One stalwart nonny has for years been diving into the fetid recesses of spn_gossip to bring back the craziest, nastiest, creepiest, and most unintentionally hilarious bits to FFA.

“Gossers,” as they are known, are tinhats who believe that Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki are deeply in wuv with one another and that their wives are simply “beards” hired to deflect public attention from that incredibly trufact. They also believe that Misha Collins, and more lately Stephen Amell, are “meards” male beards feigning gay relationships with “the Js” to distract the public from the gay relationship between the Js. There was even one Gosser who memorably claimed that Jensen’s dog, Icarus, was a “deard.”

The Gossers know these things from their deep learnings:

I think what you have to understand is that some of us have been here for years. We've been watching the Js for longer. Every single little piece of information about them that leaks into the public domain - and even some pieces that don't - are examined, catalogued, assessed, remembered. Many anons here have skills that they use in their day-jobs that help them assess the information they have; many others have experiences that may have direct relevance to what we're seeing. In short, we have an aggregate of information, built up over a decade, that has been talked over, back and forth, and not just on this comm, but in private exchanges too. That doesn't mean we know an absolute truth, of course - only the Js know that - but if we seem sure of ourselves, and disinclined to tolerate another iteration of the same arguments against J2 being gay and together, it's because we've heard it all before, and dismissed it because it doesn't fit the whole that that aggregate builds.

Unsurprisingly, Goss gets nastily misogynist when it talks about the actors' wives. They also really hate Misha Collins, and they're none too fond of Stephen Amell, either.

Here is a modest sampling of the wit and wisdom of Goss, with the best parts bolded:

That ain't workin',
That's the way you do it,
Drive the Impala on the WB.
No, that ain't workin',
That's the way you do it,
Queerbaiting for money and dicks for free.

“Misha, Misha,
Your world is the drainpipe

Misha, Misha,
Because down there, you’re at home
Endless sewers
Green vomit and sulfur smell
Misha, Misha
You need them to be happy”

One Goss thread was impressively derailed with J2 + Misha porn:

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Jensen asked.

Misha pooped up out of the ball pit like a horny ground hog. “Of course, sweetling. It was either this or a kiddy pool full of butterscotch pudding.”

“I would have preferred the pudding.” With that he stripped of his clothes and jumped in.

And then they did the sexing. Misha driving into Jared's gossamer asshole like it was a nascar track, brightly colored balls flying everywhere. And not just the plastic ones.

“Oh, yes! Harder, harder!” Jared squealed in delight, twisting Misha's nipples like radio dials.

“What the fuck are you motherfuckers doing!” It was…………….. Dumbeldore!

Wait. Wrong story.

It was…………………….. Jensen!

And Dumbledore. Together!